School of Health & Wellbeing

On 29 September 2021, Carron Shankland – Professor of Computing Science at University of Stirling and recipient of a number of awards for her work in supporting and inspiring other women scientists – delivered IHW’s Maurice Bloch lecture to an audience of 78 staff and students. 

Here, IHW Admin’s Jane Goodfellow reports back on what proved a challenging but inspiring event – making all of us think and some of us cry!

Carron’s experience

According to research, 55% of UK academics have suffered stress-related mental health problems (2016 survey) and, in a 2018 Times Higher Education survey, 87% of professional services staff reported that their work had a negative impact on their mental wellbeing.

In the context of these startling statistics, Carron gave a searingly honest, often emotional account of her own experience of mental health issues. Sometimes in tears (unusual for a formal presentation but entirely in keeping with subject matter), she described her gradual descent into a deep depression, while still striving to meet the requirements of a busy research and teaching role and to hide her difficulties from those around her.

Carron identified the following personality traits – which others working in academia may recognise in themselves – as feeding into and aggravating her symptoms:

• A tendency to seek approval from others, leading in turn to her taking on many more responsibilities than were manageable.
• A need to be perceived as reliable and competent, with the attendant fear that "admitting" to mental health difficulties would lead others to doubt her fitness and suitability for a senior academic role.
• A need to be, and be seen to be, collegiate and NOT to be seen as selfish. Again, this resulted in her adding yet more tasks and roles to an already overwhelming workload.
• Becoming bound up in perfectionism.
• An enduring sense of guilt at not being "enough" either in or out of work.

This was in addition to the external stressors inherent in the high pressure, high achieving HE environment – among them, audits, metrics and role creep – which all played their part in perpetuating her condition.

The profound impact that NOT seeking help eventually had on every aspect of Carron’s life and relationships was also described in stark detail.

Recovery, and building on lessons learned

The second half of Carron’s compelling talk focussed on the steps involved in her recovery. This began with breaking down to a concerned professional services colleague followed by a much-needed period of sickness absence. On her return, Carron also worked hard on making changes to her behaviour and mindset to ensure lasting improvements to her health and quality of life.

As Carron herself emphasised "your answers are up to you" but her advice to anyone facing a similar situation, or wanting to guard against future mental distress, includes the following (put together in consultation with University of Stirling colleague Professor Rachel Norman):

• Identify the kinds of tasks that you enjoy and, so far as you able to control how you fill your time, do more of these.
• Celebrate progress, however small or slow it may seem. (End each day thinking about what you HAVE crossed off your “to do” list, not what you haven’t.)
• Aim to be good ENOUGH – ensuring that tasks don’t stretch out beyond the time necessary to complete them to an acceptable standard, for example, and that the effort invested isn’t out of proportion to the importance of that particular piece of work.
• Recognise the benefits of saying no – turning FOMO (Fear of Missing Out) into JOMO (Joy of Missing Out). By turning down a task, we are not only freeing up time to focus on other things (including our wellbeing) but are giving another colleague what may be a welcome opportunity to contribute and develop.
• Understand WHY many of us struggle to say no, including a fear of letting others down or a sense that we may be the only person who could do the job well (i.e. vanity!), neither of which may reflect reality. (It's entirely possible that one or more colleagues were asked to take on a particular task or role, and turned it down, before we were approached...)
• Know the signs of depression – irritability, sadness and tearfulness, low self-esteem, a sense of emptiness or hopelessness, lack of focus and poor concentration, exhaustion, neglecting of self-care, disturbed sleep, changes in appetite – and take action as soon as you can if you recognise them in yourself. 
• Be kind to yourself but failing that (many of us struggle!) be kind to others. The more of us who consistently treat others well, the more supportive and nurturing our environment becomes for the entire workforce.

What attendees thought (and felt!)

Carron’s talk prompted many appreciative responses, including:

• "Best Maurice Bloch ever, what an inspiring talk and brave woman. She had me in tears! Tell her she is an inspiration to us all. I want to hug her!"
• "My goodness, what a powerful talk. I was weeping."
• "Thank you so much Carron for sharing and being so open and honest."
• "A privilege to hear you speak Carron."
• "Great talk and lots to think about."

Some resources Carron recommends

• Scientists are human twitter feed
• Pressure vessels: the epidemic of poor mental health among higher education staff (Liz Moorish, HEPI Occasional Paper 20 2019) 
• The productive researcher. Mark S Reed (Fast Track Impact, 2017)
• Cheer up love: adventures in depression with the Crab of Hate. Susan Calman (Two Roads, 2016)
• Thin slices of anxiety: observations and advice to ease a worried mind. Catherine Lepage (Chronicle Books, 2016)

Final thoughts

If any of you are in that place that I was, hopefully you’ll learn something from my story. (Carron Shankland)

We are immensely grateful to Carron for her time and insights, and for setting an example, as a senior academic, of openness about mental health difficulties.

We urge colleagues to follow her inspiring lead. For the sake of our emotional wellbeing, we could all potentially gain from making changes to the way we approach and think about our working lives (and if we are managers, helping our teams to develop a mindset that supports both productivity AND good mental health).

And if you missed this outstanding talk, or would like to listen again to Carron's wise, kind words, it’s available below...

Watch and listen again 

CONTENT WARNING This presentation contains vivid descriptions of mental distress 

Carron Shankland Maurice Bloch Lecturer September 2021

Jane Goodfellow 
Dissemination and Information Officer (IHW Admin)

If you are struggling with workload and/or with your mental health, please speak to your line manager or another trusted colleague. IHW's Kate O'Donnell, Asha Costigan, Vittal Katikireddi and Helen Minnis are also happy to talk to in confidence, if you would find that helpful. Mental health resources for staff and for students are available on the UofG Equality and Diversity Unit website. 

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First published: 13 October 2021